Tuesday, August 23, 2005

I love the ambiguities of the English



Desdemona, my partner in Art Department crime, sent me this. I snorted audibly when I read it, especially number one and number six and number eight..

Eight Words With Two Meanings

1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female… Any part under a car's hood.
Male… The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female… Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male… Playing football without a cup.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female… The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male… Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female… A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male… Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female… An embarrassing byproduct of digestion.
Male… A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.

7. MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female… The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male… Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.

8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female… A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male… A device for scanning through all 375 channels every five minutes.

But wait! There's more ambiguous humor … and I liberated it from KurtP.



Yar!